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April 4, 2010

World turned upside down

I was so flattered when I saw that Pasta Queen was pondering where I was. I'm here, occasionally lurking, just enough to stay barely up to date on a fraction of the sites I used to follow.

I was doing ok for a while, managing my weight at around 180. Until a couple of months ago when my world changed like I have never experienced before. Not even like when my daughter was born. My mom suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. Even writing that seems surreal.

I kind of felt like I was doing ok, managing to continue life with a bit of optimism and positivity. Now I'm not exactly sure. It's not getting any easier and I'm still not used to it. I'm simply not happy about it. My weight is probably reflecting that because I'm now at 198, occasionally seeing 200 (I guess when I'm retaining a little more water). 18 pounds in about two months, not so good.

Anywhoo, I've been meaning to resurface even before PQ mentioned me. It feels good to post even when I don't really know what my long term intentions are. Right now writing is distracting me from eating. Good enough.

I just treated myself to an iPad. I hope it makes some tasks easier and more enjoyable, like posting, tracking my calories, and even cooking. It is very cool. Let's see if it keeps me focused.

Posted by hopeful @ April 4, 2010 10:01 PM