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November 15, 2009

I'm not sure what to try next

I've gained about ten pounds in a month or so. I'm physically feeling pretty bad but I feel almost powerless to stop. I'm in that instant gratification cycle where I eat, feel a high for about five minutes, and then awful when I come down and am aware of my fat. I don't like to use the word powerless but I feel like I'm only half conscious while it's happening and then I wake up feeling guilty when it's swelling in my stomach.

It makes me think I need detox or some serious external restraints to stop. I just got rid of all clothes over size 14 so I really need to set this back on track because my pants are nearly cutting me in half.

I did acupuncture about four times but it's really expensive and I don't feel different enough to justify going back when I need to conserve money for my daughter's Christmas presents.

Now I'm going to try hypnosis when I go to bed and every day I am going to give it my best effort to exercise. I don't think that there's a "pill" (the acupuncture or hypnosis) out there that's going to make this easy or anything. I know it's calories in versus out and that I need to exercise but I need something to help quiet my mind or ease my nerves or whatever it is that's going on.

I'm going to try and squeeze in the most moderate amount of exercise and see if that will help kick me into gear.

Posted by hopeful @ November 15, 2009 11:27 AM