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April 9, 2009

Just wishing

Wishing I could be with my daughter right now.

(rather than working so much. sometimes i feel like i hardly see her.)

guilt on top of missing her doesn't feel so great.

Posted by hopeful @ 2:33 PM

April 6, 2009

I don't know what I'm doing here

I know I have completely abandoned HL. I've also been terrible at keeping in touch with people in my real life (ones that I don't see almost on a daily basis, that is).

Things have been going really well and I've been quite busy. That's mostly why I haven't posted. I still work a lot and when I have free time I want to spend it with my family and friends. I can't get myself to stay on the computer an extra minute.

As my daughter gets older our social life has really picked up. We're settling in here in NJ and making a bunch of new friends. It feels super great.

I've met a bunch of women who motivate me to work out because we go in groups. I'll be doing three triathlons this summer (with these new friends and my sister). My training regimen has just picked up for the first Tri on May 31. Physically I've been feeling very in shape and strong. My weight loss efforts are still a lot tougher, but I've been holding steady at 180 lbs. I'm trying to slowly chip away at that so the weight stays off and doesn't send me into a yo-yoing frenzy.

So while I would rather be thinner, I'm pretty OK with how that's going and I know as my training picks up (as it has over the past couple of weeks) I will probably lose a bit more. I'm already 9 pounds thinner than I was when I did the last Triathlon in September.

I always hold on to hope that I'll reinvent myself a little more this year, redesign this site, and get back to posting regularly. On the big events, like the triathlons or if I ever get prego again (nope still not yet), or anything else major, I'll be sure to share. On big things like that I feel way more compelled to write. I guess on some of the mundane stuff it's hard to find the motivation or something that will make it interesting from day to day.

Thanks for checking in on me

Posted by hopeful @ 2:39 PM