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September 11, 2008

I think I’m a doctor

I can’t belabor my posts otherwise I’m just not going to write. I’ve been in such a mental state that my mind is either working too fast or not at all. It’s hard for me to hold onto a thought and when I try to construct coherent posts so that I sound like a sane and normal human being, it’s not happening.

Since I’ve been trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant for a real long time and I can’t afford alternative options or testing etc. I thought I would come up with my own theories for why it’s not happening. That’s healthy, huh? Ever since I saw the movie Lorenzo’s Oil I think I can diagnose myself and discover cures. Seriously.

Anyway, I take a tablespoon of Flaxseed oil once a day because I could swear by it helping with my anxiety and depression. Then I read about how you shouldn’t take it if you’re pregnant because it can cause bleeding. But then I also read it does something to your estrogen levels (not unlike soy). I eat flax and a lot of soy, so I thought maybe that was preventing me from getting prego.

I decided to take a break from the flax despite worrying about the effect on my mental state. I didn’t feel a profound difference in my mood but I gained a few pounds. Initially I didn’t think anything of it but this month I decided to go back on the flax because maybe I started to feel a dip in my mood, I’m not sure. But since I did, I lost three of the 6 pounds I gained. We’ll see if it sticks (and goes further).

My appetite has felt better. I think I’ve been doing less emotional eating. See, maybe that’s where the flax helps, I don’t know but I’m sticking with the Flax. I haven’t been able to find anywhere that says it might prevent or hinder getting pregnant.

See what I consume myself with?!

Not that I’m going to be in a TRIATHLON this weekend!! AAAHHHHH.

Posted by hopeful @ September 11, 2008 10:05 AM