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December 31, 2007

Happy New Year

I’m tired. I’m sad that the week long Christmas celebration is over. We did so much with family and friends this past week, it was wonderful. Now I have no more distractions. I really need to get off of my butt anyways.

I did well not gaining weight over Thanksgiving, but Christmas, forget about it. I’m very afraid to go near the scale, although, I don’t even have to because my pants are squeezing the truth out of me. Thanks to the digital age, I already saw pictures from yesterday where I could not make a distinction between my boobs and my belly roll. Unfortunately, after breast feeding I’m not so sure I can assume the one closer to the ground was my belly.

The first half of this year was awful but the second half flipped 180 degrees and was great. Of course, because I suffer from severe anxiety I can hardly find any comfort in that. My new year’s resolution is to feel more in control. I want gain control of my fitness and health and feel like I can enjoy myself. I want to gain the confidence to tackle any crazy situation that might arise. My anxiety convinces me that those crazy situations are imminent and I can only find comfort in that I’m equipped to handle them. I just want to be at peace with myself and the world around me.

I think it’s critical to my mental health to eat well and exercise. I’m quite concerned about by mental-ness that it takes precedence over my weight.

I think I need to cut back on TV to regain my ability to focus. My attention span has diminished to maybe five minutes.

I want to find my passion and become really good at something.

Happy New Year from my family!

Posted by hopeful @ December 31, 2007 1:35 PM