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April 19, 2007

I’m off for a little bit

I head out tomorrow for my trip to California. I haven’t decided if I’m going to bring my laptop. My work laptop is out of commission and my personal laptop is not meant for a lap it’s so damn big. So I might not really be able to communicate during my 11 day long trip.

I have mixed feelings about my trip. I’m going to miss my daughter miserably and I don’t want to see anyone. But I will enjoy some me time away. Right now I feel crappy and sad. However, I’m sure there will be many moments I enjoy.

It’s 9:00 and I’m not prepared at all and I don’t have any time tomorrow. I wish I could sleep.

Did I mention that I’m taking a train? I’ll be traveling three days across the country because I am too anxious to fly (I’ve flown over a hundred times in my life, this only happened this past year.) Most people think I’m crazy for taking the train (everyone thinks I’m crazy for not being able to fly), a few think it’s interesting, and the least amount think it’s cool. I think it’s cool and I’m not just saying that because I can’t face the alternative. I really do. I’ve driven across the country 10 times. I’m hoping I have some personal revelation during the romantic journey through mountains and plains, into and out of sunsets.

On the eating front: I’ve probably eaten more this past week than I have the three weeks prior combined. I’ve been gorging myself since Friday. I’m sure it’s my anxiety and feeling loss of control. I’m a total nut case.

Posted by hopeful @ April 19, 2007 9:20 PM