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March 27, 2007

Neverending stoo-auryeeeee

Jeeze, I’m tired of this (not tired enough to change, just complain I guess). This past weekend was the same as the last. I spent a lot of time with my parents eating pizza. That’s the most common meat eater’s solution to the vegetarian option. I’m not blaming anybody else for me eating it though.

I’ve been afraid of the scale this week. I’m just going to avoid discouraging myself and try to get back on track. I’ve still been exercising but I know I’m eating too much because I have that perpetual full feeling.

I’m not sure if I filled you guys in on the saga that is my nutty bastard husband. I’ll try to keep this to the point… Last week, after two weeks of promising that he was looking and applying to jobs, I uncovered that he actually hadn’t applied to even one! I nearly fainted and felt like I was going to die on the spot. Thank goodness we had an upcoming counseling appointment so I could confirm that I’m not crazy and this is such an insane situation. She buckled down on him and now he’s going by himself weekly.

The good news is that he has now applied to nearly 10 jobs. He’s going to have to do way better than that but it’s a start. Two have already called him for an interview and he has an interview for a special teaching program this week as well. I’m hoping this will boost his confidence and he will pick up momentum and things will go OK.

I’m having a real hard time keeping it together. My husband seems to be incapable of multi-tasking so he’s not able to be nice to me and nurture our relationship while getting his life back on track. So, currently I feel pretty darn alone in this house. With any spare time I try to spend it with my daughter doing fun things. I love that, but I want to figure out how to fulfill my own happiness and feel like I’m living. Otherwise I feel like I’m just a robot, a tool for the betterment of other people.

Posted by hopeful @ March 27, 2007 3:01 PM