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March 1, 2007

191 for two days in a row

I’m slowly plugging away to my goal. I guess I'm weighing myself nearly everyday because I'm so excited to get below 190.

As we speak I’m having my morning coffee while mustering up the energy to get on my elliptical trainer. I haven’t missed a day yet. I do a moderate paced 30 minutes where I burn about 300-350 calories so it’s not too difficult. I plan on building up my strength and endurance but for now this with eating well is probably giving me a safe average of two pounds per week.

I’m feeling really good and I know that exercise has to be a part of my life forever. Not only has all my life’s worth of dieting crippled my metabolism but I suffer from quite bad anxiety and barring medication, exercise is the only thing that makes me feel better.

I’ve taken medication before when my life was really chaotic and I’m grateful for it but I really want to stay away from it for as long as I can. Much of my anxiety is situational and depends on what’s going on in my life but increasingly I’m having random episodes. Just last night while watching Amer. Idol I thought an aneurism was about to explode my head. I’m sure this idea was spurred on by some episode of CSI or House, none the less I feel like a walking time bomb.

Now that the coffee has kicked in let me go and work out. I’ll watch an uplifting home improvement show to make my exercise feel like nothing. DIY fantasy along with the adrenaline will medicate me for the day.

Posted by hopeful @ March 1, 2007 9:29 AM