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November 1, 2005

164 - not bad all considering

Sorry, by the way, amidst all of the chaos I need to figure out my posting schedule.

I weighed in at 164 yesterday. I’m very happy that after at least two weeks of being off my game has only resulted in a net gain of one pound.

I can’t say that I got a bunch of stuff out of my system. That is metaphorically speaking of course because, in actuality, I was stuffing my system. I hadn’t felt the need for a break or anything. The somewhat out of control feeling that I felt, swept upon me unexpectedly.

I’m sure it was my unconscious response to what was happening around me. I had so much going on and I felt overwhelmed and out of control. I had brought it all on myself by timing my kitchen renovation with starting a new job. To make the kitchen renovation worse, I set a deadline for completing the paint that I wasn’t sure I could make. Compounding that misery, yet further, I set that deadline in stone by scheduling to get my floors done. I’m crazy that way.

I’m getting better at making decisions that take my wellbeing into consideration more. Not that you’d know it from my recent behavior, but I am, and it is having a real positive impact on my ability to manage my eating. My self-destructive behavior of choice is over-eating. And that’s what I do when I put everybody and everything else before me, more often than not.

I’ve made it through this rough patch and come to grips with the fact that I’m going to have to slow down and not put so much pressure on myself to get everything done yesterday. It’ll get done when I can get to it.

I’m posting from work right now. Kind of crazy and I can’t make this a habit. I’m keep thinking someone is going to peek over my shoulder and see.

I’m going to workout at the gym here today. I want to take off three pounds this week so that I can break the previously lowest weight of 163. I’m putting that out there so you can hold me to it.

Gotta go!

Posted by hopeful @ November 1, 2005 9:24 AM