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August 18, 2005

Office Space

I have to go into the office on Tuesday. The last time I was there I weighed 190, 15 pounds heavier than I am now. I used to hate going into the office (remember this and this?) While I still don’t enjoy being there, it has been fun showing them a new me each time.

So I have to start planning my outfit and getting ready. I like to dye my hair so it’s fresh and black as can be. I get my eyebrows threaded so they look sharp. I might even treat myself to a manicure and a pedicure.

I’m going to start trying on some clothes tonight. Since I did my clean sweep, I have a bunch of great new clothes ranging in sizes 10 – 14. I think I’ll be able to fit into size 12 depending on the style. Maybe I’ll treat myself to something new from Torrid.

Even though I've now lost a lot of weight, I actually haven't had the nerve to step into a store that wasn't a plus size store. I enjoy being in the lower end sizes of Torrid now. It's like I have that "big fish in a little pond" syndrome. (Kind of weird how that works out because I’m more like a littler fish in a big pond.) I feel great when I walk in there knowing that, now, almost anything will look pretty good on me.

I’m terrified to walk into the regular stores because the nightmares of not fitting into their largest sizes are still fresh in my mind. They also screw with your head a bit because so many of them make their clothes small. Even when you think you’re one size they’ll have you believing you’re not quite.

I don’t want the depressive setback. Because I’m teetering on a size 12, what many stores only go up to, I’m not going to take my chances yet. I’ll wait until I’m safely in a size 10 before I venture back to the regular stores. For now I’ll just stick with Torrid and feel like I’m a super model when I try on the clothes.

Posted by hopeful @ August 18, 2005 9:22 AM