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August 25, 2005

Ode to Pendulous Jason

I’m not feeling very well again. I have what I think is a recurrence of that flu from just a month ago, damn it. As I lay here on my bed typing this (not sure exactly what I’m going to write about), I look like I’m melting. You know how when you lie on your back and your boobs find a new resting place in your arm pits? I hope I’m not alone here because it gets worse. Mine are resting on the bed next to me. And just below them is my stomach. It’s not below both of them simultaneously because it usually picks a side.

When I was heavier things were taut, now things are starting to hang and, dare I say, are more pendulous. (That word cracks me up because many years ago John Henson of Talk Soup referred to a male stripper as “Pendulous Jason” for obvious reasons. I have been looking for an opportunity to use it ever since. Wheh-hew.) I’m sure it’s the stretch marks, which I’ve only now started to notice, that are responsible for the extra lose skin. I really didn’t think I had them before. They’re revealing themselves under my arms a little, and around my thighs and hips. Crap-ola.

On a more positive note, none of that is bothering me too much. I’m so excited about the changes in my body right now that I’m OK with the saggy. If you held your hand to your eye, like you where holding a telescope (or like a sign language O), then closed your other eye and aimed your hand telescope at my stomach (excluding everything else) you would think you’re looking at a 90 year old lady. Despite even that, I’m happy.

Posted by hopeful @ August 25, 2005 10:44 PM