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March 31, 2005

Are you kidding me?

You know that nightmare story where someone asks you when the baby is due and you’re not pregnant?

Does this count? ... I was in the maternity store buying clothes (this might be my fault) with my daughter (almost 14 months) and I was chatting it up (as per usual) with the sales clerk when she asked me “when are you due?” I pointed to my daughter and said “oh, you’re lookin’ at her. Yup, I have no excuse.” She apologized profusely as she tried to convince me that she (maybe a size 4) shops there too.

It was a maternity store after all, so maybe that led to the misunderstanding? Unless she just started working there, though, how could that not have happened to her before? Has no other non-pregnant, simply, just heavy person ever shopped there before? How could she not have asked them too and learned her lesson?

Moral of the story: Err on the side of caution and don’t ask.

Oh there’s more…
Not too long ago, I went out to dinner with some co-workers, including my boss, where most of them drank a little bit. My boss actually put quite a few down and I, for no particular reason, didn’t drink at all. During the car ride home I mentioned my low tolerance and how I’m loopy after just a couple glasses of wine, to which my boss responded with a dumbfounded “huh, that surprises me, I woulda’ thought...” I had to nip it in the bud with “muscle metabolizes alcohol better than fat does.” There was a nice lengthy silence after that. I’m not sure he meant to think that out loud.

Moral once again: Shutty uppy!

If I had a nickel…
For every time someone looked at me in disbelief when I tell them I’m a vegetarian. I’ve even had one person tell me that all the vegetarians they knew were “like emaciated.”

I’ve been a vegetarian (mostly vegan) for over 7 years; I’m living proof that you can be vegetarian and fat. There is plenty to eat and it’s not rabbit food. May I remind you that Cheetos are vegetarian!

Moral…: I give up, call Ripley’s

Posted by hopeful @ March 31, 2005 7:42 AM